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Graves: Check Out Bed and Breakfast | Opinion

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The whole bed and breakfast concept is very ingenious and fits my lifestyle perfectly.

In fact, the words “bed” and “breakfast” are fair expressions of my favorite activities, namely eating, sleeping and eating. I’d like to reinvent this idea and call it a “noon bed and breakfast” because my wife and I are both late sleepers and most Saturdays we’re done with pancakes by 2:00 p.m.

As for my wife, if she wants me to leave it at that, we spent our wedding night at the Jefferson Historic Bed and Breakfast. The most memorable aspect of our stay was the so-called “bathroom plug event” except that it was accompanied by a wedding party. Now, before you let your imaginations run wild, let me explain.

Our honeymoon suite had an antique, clawfoot tub with brass fittings, into which I looked forward to performing my most romantic cannonballs after drowning in my penguin suit on a sweltering East Texas August eve. Unfortunately, in our post-wedding delirium, we couldn’t find the antique bathroom drain plug.

I slipped into my fancy rental dressing gown and went downstairs to the owners’ room and knocked on the French doors. When they opened, a dark-eyed man appeared surrounded by wisps of acrid smoke. Now, I’m not 100% positive about the source of the smoke, but let’s just say that this guy is probably pretty sick.

After I had explained my dilemma very slowly and deliberately, the owner stumbled up the stairs, into our room, into the bathroom, where he pointed to the brass drain plug, camouflaged with a brass soap dish, and looked at me suspiciously with his mouth open. opened up a bit and simply said “Boy”.

By the way, there was fun and cannon fire.

My wife and I recently decided to experience the whole bed and breakfast experience – minus the abandoned owner – at the charming Brazos Bed and Breakfast in a rural cottage suite in Washington, Texas, just a short drive from Texas A&M University. dear daughter will participate.

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We thought it would be nice to have some peace and quiet in the country, but also enough to go see the Aggie football team play time out and go again so we could ask our daughter for money.

Upon our arrival, the owner pointed out the electric fence surrounding the beautiful property on the ground to prevent the armadillos from having grazing parties and dancing.

I had never used a bidet before and wasn’t sure how it would work, but I carefully pressure washed the opposite bathroom wall.

Even though we had to get up before noon, the breakfast was plentiful and delicious. The gracious host served breakfast in our suite and told us, “Don’t ever feel like you have to eat everything. We have chickens and they love leftovers!”

My only thought was whether or not we could eat the chickens too.

We had a great trip, although I would have liked some more bed time for breakfast. I’m even thinking of buying a clawfoot tub for our house one day – once I figure out how to install one in a bid.

— Jace Graves, a Longview resident, is a syndicated columnist for Cagle Cartoons and a regular contributor to the News-Journal.

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